Thursday, June 24, 2010

Love Shoudn't Hurt

I remember when we met
Fresh feelings so new
You said, don’t worry baby,
I’m goin take of you

We were so in love
Kissy kissy here
Hugging everywhere
You said baby, if I can help it
You’ll never shed a tear

You said my eyes
Were like a mirror to your soul
You’d never leave me
I’ll always have your shoulder
And your hand to hold

I remember when, you said
You can’t bare another day
Of walking this life
Without me as your wife

I remember when
You got so excited
When the doctor said it was a boy
You promised to be a great dad
Because a father figure you never had

I remember all the good times we had
But then something changed
And at times
Things did seem ALL bad
You didn’t come home anymore
You barely said good bye
When you walked out the door
Got women calling our house
All hours of the night
And when I try to talk to you
You always start an argument
Then don’t come home out of spite

It’s painful
But I’m trying to go over
Everything that happened
Last Tuesday night
We had dinner
You insisted on picking a fight
I tried to agree with you
Just to avoid,
Another sleepless night

I remember telling you
We need some outside help
This abuse has gone on too long
And the first step to healing
Is admitting you are wrong

I even kept saying; If not for me
Then do it for our sons’ sake
And if you are not willing to change
Then we need to take a break

For a second…
I swear…
I saw your eyes go blank
And that’s when you snapped
‘Cause round my throat
Your arms were tightly wrapped

And when your Fist connected my face
I thought I was dead for sure
‘Cause everything went dark
As my blood trickled
And my bleeding body hit the floor

As tears roll from my eyes
I remember
Our son
Screaming in the background
I tried getting away
But it was, my stomach
That your size 11 found

I can remember the day
You said you’d treat me
like “I was your Queen”
Well here I lay
Beaten and bruised
The doctor said
I’m lucky to be alive
You’ve even ruptured my spleen

Laying here in this hospital bed
Has given me much time to think
Where we went wrong?
What I did or didn’t do?
To make you so angry
That you’d beat me lifeless
Leaving me black and blue

My heart is broken
And I just want to scream
I keep thinking
Any minute now,
I’ll wake up from this dream

My body is tattered
And my spirit is crushed
My memories are tarnished
The uncertainty of “He loves me”
Or “He loves me not”
Speaks louder
Every time I hear the beep
From the oxygen machine

This is my wake up call
Love Shouldn’t Hurt
No matter how great or small
So through these bandages
I can finally see
I’m not alone
And I’m still alive
Because a higher power
Was always watching over me

© Lisa Goycochea

For more information or to get help, please call:
National Domestic Violence Hotline 1800-799-7233

Note: Did you know
1 in every 4 women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime.
An estimated 1.3 million women fall victim to physical assault by an intimate partner each year.
85% of domestic violence victims are women.
And Most cases of domestic violence are never reported to the police.
For More Info, Follow Link:

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